With a fifth round of snow (or sixth? It’s easy to lose count) this winter and an ever-elusive spring being a particularly awful tease this year, Berliners are getting grumpier by the second. The dose of vitamin D received a couple weeks back has definitely run its course. So what’s a Berliner to do? Here’s a list of 5 steps to ensure you survive the winter (emotionally and mentally, that is)…

5. Turn back your calendar to last year. December 2012 would work just fine. Not that you should entirely give up on spring ever coming, you’ll just forget to expect it. Hit up the discount stores for leftover Glühwein and start a Weihnachtsmarkt stand with some pals (you’re bound to at least get some smiles or funny stares – the difference is not always clear with the Germans, especially in winter time). Don’t forget the adage: red wine does indeed get better with age.

4. Stock up on discounted winter gear. The good thing about a long winter (or a winter re-awakened after a short spell of springtime weather) is that a ton of winter gear has been put on sale. Think those idyllic and super cute wooden sleds are just for German kids? Ditch the cardboard, grab one of those super sturdy sleds and climb Teufelsberg. The exercise and adrenaline are sure to counteract the winter blues.

Peter Pink strikes again!
3. Paint the streets. The streets are now a blank canvas! It’s time to add some much-need (legal) color. (See Peter Pink street art above.)

2. Stay indoors. Easy enough. Get some first-hand experience on the benefits of an extended Winterschlaf!

1. Fuck it. Get outdoors and start a BBQ anyway. La Pizzeria, a trio of Italian artists living it up in Weissensee, are right on the money with their “White Springtime” BBQ this Friday, March 22nd 2013. Take note.